in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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