at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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