You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
