I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
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