oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
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