im gay
i know
yea but for you.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
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