you guys were way drunker than both of me
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I don't deserve a penis
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize