The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
