I don't think brook has ever known best
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
