whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
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