Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize
