Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night