Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Everything about him screamed your future.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
