jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Randomize