So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize