They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
you made out with another girl for some wings
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
