i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
