His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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