i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Randomize
