Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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