Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
He keeps bees of course he's weird
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
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