He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
