i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Randomize
