Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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