Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
We are two peas in an std pod
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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