On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
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