I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
