goodnight i made you a song goodbye
4 words: hood of his car
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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