My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
