The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i think my tv is drunk
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.