i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
are you so shy because you have an std?
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize