put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize