Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Randomize