glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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