Someone shit on the floor
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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