i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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