Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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