Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
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