Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
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it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
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I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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