I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
