Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I party with great urgency now.
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