I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
