Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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