I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize