when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
try to milk me bitch
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