how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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