Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
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