I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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