i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
