wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize