And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
